Combatting nausea and realizing fears

I finally got my Zofran refilled by my GP. Seeing her was a bit ironic as my OB is her Dad! She was super excited for us though. She gave me a 1 year refill (knowing I won’t need that much) and also one for Ranitidine (Zantac) to curb my heartburn. If you have the prescription, you can get it covered by your benefits instead of buying it over the counter.

So far, I’m feeling much better. I tried to skip my night time dose last night, but that proved to be a wrong decision. Things seem to work well if I take 1 pill at night and 1 pill at noon. I’ve realized that I need to stop being so stubborn and take the damn meds. I need some quality of life during this pregnancy. Self-care is important and in this case, taking the meds is caring for myself. This whole medicated versus natural debate keeps coming up in my life though.

In two weeks, my husband and I are starting hypnobirthing classes. I’ve always desired to have a natural birth. Although, I am open to an alternate birth plan if complications arise.

Last night, I had a bath and began to read the Hypnobirthing manual. A few chapters in, I realized that I have SO MUCH FEAR around medical intervention during birth. I have heard many stories lately about full episiotomies, vaccums, foreceps, etc. It almost seems more traumatizing when they intervene while a mother is trying to have a vaginal birth versus simply wheeling you in for a c-section.

I find this fear to be ironic as clearly medical intervention has been a good thing for us. Without it, we would not have conceived our children. As a mother who has experienced pregnancy loss, medical intervention also eases my worries. Every ultrasound and OB appointment gives me validation that my baby is ok.

Still, I long for some control on this journey. I desire one thing to go as I planned… Perhaps that’s the issue? Do I need to let go of ALL need to control?

Either way, I don’t have the answer. I hope to work through it and get to the root cause as we prepare for baby’s arrival.

I’m officially 16 weeks today. 🙂 ❤

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