12 month update

Well… since Wyatt is 13 months old in 5 days, I’d say this update is LONG OVERDUE!

I’ve been so disconnected from WordPress lately. For those of you who I have on Facebook or Instagram, I try to keep up on there. Turns out, chasing after a toddler and running my own business take up WAY MORE time than I anticipated.

I considered whether it was the end of Awaiting Autumn, but I don’t feel like I’m ready to make that decision. I still have A LOT to say about infertility and pregnancy loss. I’d like to keep this going… for now, at least.

Wyatt’s now been in daycare for well over 2 months. Some days he’s there for a full 8 hours, other days it’s only a half day or so. I try to keep him home with me one day a week if I can fit it in. He absolutely loves daycare and all his friends. He’s adjusted so well.

Turns out, my kid is WAY MORE extroverted than both my husband and I. We joke that we can’t believe how much energy he has sometimes. Mike is quickly learning that coming home from work no longer means downtime.

My social butterfly is doing well with other kids. I noticed how much daycare has changed him when his one little friend came over for a playdate. Wyatt basically went up to him and gave him a hug. Before starting daycare, he was much more apprehensive about other kids.  He totally loves being around people, but sometimes needs his quiet time too. The daycare ladies have told me that he doesn’t like it when other kids are upset or if it’s too loud after his nap time. I joke this is his sensitive nature coming out.

The sickness trend continues. Wyatt’s been sick every other week since starting daycare. Last week was pink eye. I’ve never been so sick myself. I know I need to focus on self care a bit more (translation: not working late nights) to ensure I keep us both healthy.

Wyatt started taking steps about a month ago. He’s not walking all the time yet, but he definitely is walking unassisted. He’s so proud of himself for learning how to do it.

He’s also turned into a major bookworm. His favourite activity is reading. He has books in our bedroom, the living room, the kitchen, the bathroom, the car – basically everywhere. The first thing he does every morning is reach for a book. It warms my heart to see him  so engaged in reading. He would rather read a book than watch tv.  If he’s having a bad day or I REALLY need to get something done, I’ll sometimes stream Sesame Street for him.

He’s also talking quite a bit more. His vocabulary includes, “Mama, Dada, Max, Bella, Buh-bye, Uh-oh, What, Yeah..” and he makes a few animal sounds, like “Baaa, Mooo, Eeekeek (monkey).” He also blows kisses which is something daycare taught him. ❤

Guess what? We are still co-sleeping, cloth diapering and breastfeeding (bet you didn’t see that one coming – haha!). I am doing good at keeping up with pumped bottles for daycare, so we haven’t done any transition to milk yet.

I miss my little baby. I often look at photos of Wyatt when he was fresh and wish I could hold him like that again. But, I’m amazed at the smart, caring and sensitive little boy he’s becoming.

As for me, I’m good. Life is crazy right now. I’m working on finding balance. It’s been an enlightening process running my own business.These days I’m focused on clarity, intention and boundaries. I’m learning a lot – especially how to trust in the flow of life . That sense of trust is definitely something I acquired after facing infertility.  My type A personality has shifted.

I’m also living more in the moment. We spent so long – so many years – focused on trying to get our baby here. I want to soak up these moments before we blink and he’s all grown up. We booked a family vacation next month to Florida. We’re meeting my brother and his family there. Wyatt will get to play with his cousins and we can visit with some of my husband’s family who live nearby as well. I’ve never taken a trip like this – especially not one that was booked so spontaneously. It feels great to know I can do this and that I can set my own schedule to make it happen.

Life is good. I am so blessed. ❤




The daycare solution

A few months ago, I wrote about my daycare dilemma. I had many options to ponder – part-time nanny, nanny share, home daycare, daycare centre – but I wasn’t sure which was the best for us.

After 3 home daycare interviews and a tour of the daycare centre that offered us a spot, I’m very happy to announce that we’ve chosen the daycare centre.

We made our decision back in June, just before we left to visit my family. We literally had 48 hours to decide after taking the tour.

Reasons we chose a daycare centre over home daycare

  • Reliability – open Mon-Fri 7am to 6pm except stat holidays
  • Flexibility – we can take our family vacation whenever we want, not based on someone else’s schedule
  • Regulated and Secure – Safety plans, log in/out sheets, communication books. I really like the process of how a daycare centre is run.
  • Experience – All staff have mandatory education levels, first aid courses, etc.
  • Kid-friendly building –  Built in 2011, it’s new and designed for kids in mind (little toilets and all!)
  • Fits our lifestyle – cloth diaper friendly, breast milk bottle friendly, flexible nap schedules. They are willing to work with us to make it work for Wyatt.
  • Long-term potential – Wyatt can stay in the centre until he reaches school-age, potentially longer depending which school he attends.

Downfalls to going with a daycare centre

  • Less personal – Wyatt will not always be taken care of by the same person, but that also means he’s adapting. On the flip side, I was worried about a day home being too personal. I mean if you have an issue with a single care provider, it becomes personal.
  • Busier atmosphere – even though Wyatt will be in the infant room, there is lots of activity going on in the centre. I found it overwhelming. I just hope my little man adjusts ok and isn’t too overstimulated. Wyatt is so curious and loves bigger kids. I’m sure this downfall will end up being a positive in the end.

The current situation

Now…here’s the biggest catch: We had to take the spot for July 1st. We are already paying for daycare even though Wyatt won’t be attending full-time until October.

This may sound crazy, but the odds of us getting another centre spot in our city before October 1st were slim to none. We figured the financial output is worth the long-term gain.

They also told me I am free to do drop-in care as I need it. Basically, we are paying for the spot and we are free to use it as we please. They are always staffed to accommodate him as if he is there full-time.  I’m going to drop him off Thursday morning for an hour while I have a dentist appointment.

I’m not going to deny it. The whole concept of dropping him at daycare is heartbreaking. I worry whenever he’s not with me or his Dad. Will they catch onto his queues? Will he be upset the whole time? 

The plan is to phase Wyatt in gradually until I return to work. The Daycare Director was awesome and very encouraging. She actually suggested the gradual transition. I plan to drop him off for appointments over July/August, and put him in 1-2 days a week in September building up to my full-time return to work.

As for my work situation, I can’t spill the beans just yet on what’s happening. I will when I am able to. I feel like the Universe has answered many of the requests I’ve put out there. Finding a daycare we are comfortable with was just the start.



The daycare dilemma

I’m a horrible blogger. Pre-baby’s arrival, I was convinced I would document his every step. Then, he arrived and my world completely changed. I actually found lots of time to write during the newborn phase, but now that he’s (semi)mobile I can’t spare two free hands to put on a keyboard.

Sometimes,  I feel like documenting his milestones make it all too real. He’s growing. He’s getting bigger. He is more independent…which means…

I’m closer to going back to work. 😦

I seriously don’t know how you American Momma’s do it. I’m so grateful to have 12 months off in Canada, but I am struggling with the concept of leaving my baby with someone else.

In my city, it’s challenging to find daycare for a 12 month old. Licensed centres don’t offer many spots until 18 months old (which makes no sense with our maternity leave timeframe?). Needless to say, I’ve been on waitlists since I was only a few weeks pregnant. Lately, I’ve been watching the online Mommy groups and classifieds for home daycares advertising available infant spots.

I’m not going to deny it. I’m picky and have requirements for what we are looking for:

  1. Chemical free (as much as possible)
  2. Healthy snacks/meals
  3. Low ratio
  4. Cloth diaper friendly

I talked to another Mom about the possibility of a nanny share, but that idea fell through.

Last week I interviewed with an AMAZING home daycare. The woman was a true modern day Mary Poppins. Her program is also Waldorf/Reggio inspired with homemade meals and many organic snacks. Bonus: she also cloth diapers. The issue is she is doing multiple interviews. As much as we were there to check her out, I was super nervous that Wyatt and I were also being interviewed. Out of all the people she is interviewing, we are the ones looking for a start date the furthest out. We won’t know until after June 7th what her decision is.

Today, I got a call from a daycare centre that they have a spot open for July 1st if I want it. I set up a tour to check out this facility on Thursday. If we like the centre, we will have to decide by end of day FRIDAY if we want the spot AND pay for it until I return to work.

I have one other home daycare interview lined up this week. I didn’t get a super positive vibe from the gal, so we will see how it goes.

Right now, my return to work scenario is completely up in the air. The company I work for was bought out (once again) just prior to my maternity leave starting. Since then, there’s been major changes in leadership. I don’t know what I am going back to. If I do return to my current employer, I’m planning to stay on leave until October 1. I’m keeping my eyes open for opportunities. I’m not willing to return to work until after the summer. I’d really like to stay working from home if possible too.

I’ve had people say, “Lindsey, if you are working from home, why don’t you just keep him home with you?”  We don’t follow a regimented schedule. I base my days around baby’s needs. We don’t have pre-determined nap times. I breastfeed on demand. We just go with the flow and I don’t see how that would work with a 40 hour work week… and not knowing what I’m in for.

My husband threw out the idea of me freelancing part-time and getting to stay home with Wyatt. The idea sounds AMAZING in concept, but I’m not sure the logistics of it are realistic. I haven’t been doing any freelance work throughout my maternity leave, so I don’t have any clientele right now. I love the idea of building up to freelancing on my own, but right now, I need a steady, reliable income. We still have IVF debt to pay off and would like to try another round in the future. :/

I trust that the situation will all work out. I know I’ll end up in the position that is right for me. I’ll continue to listen to my intuition when it comes to selecting the right care provider for Wyatt.

Until then, I just want to enjoy my summer of snuggles, cuddles, laughter and love before my baby becomes a little boy. ❤