Taking some time for me

After my meltdown last weekend, I actually had a good week. I decided to just go with the flow and not have any big expectations of myself. I focused on smaller tasks rather than taking on anything huge (meaning: laundry was an accomplishment). Wyatt and I even managed to sneak in a few walks in our neighbourhood since we had some way above seasonally average days (+3 degrees Celsius ).

Things are better with Mike. I keep focusing on how communication is key even more so now that we have a child. I have to laugh at today though. Mike was solo parenting for 3 hours this morning and 1 hour this afternoon. When I returned home between outings, he told me, “You better be nice to me. I changed like 35+ diapers and played with him constantly between naps. He did sleep for most of the time you were gone though“.

Right… You mean you did exactly what I do every day of the week… except you probably had it easier because it sounds like Wyat napped like a champ today. 🙂

I am enjoying my moments of Mommy freedom. Since the first night I left him with Mike and a bottle, I’ve escaped a few more times to get my hair cut/coloured, attend a fertility yoga class, participate in a Chakradance session, get a massage, and go to our local infertility support group meet up. Even if it’s just an hour or two every couple of days, its allowing me to feel more grounded and return to myself.

I don’t regret waiting til 3 months to offer a bottle. We still have a strong breastfeeding connection, but I do appreciate the fact that he will take it if I’m gone. I also learned that I am a supreme pumper. Each time I’ve pumped, I’ve been able to get between 5-7oz. I split it into 1-2oz bottles/bags. Wyatt won’t take much from a bottle right now. The most he’s drank in one sitting is 2 oz. We’ve had to toss some milk due to this, so I’m really trying to freeze as much as I can and only leave 1-2 oz fresh in the fridge. Mike can thaw more if he needs it.

What breast milk freezer bags do you prefer? I’ve been using the Medela ones, but I’m almost out. I’m open to trying a different brand if anyone has a recommendation.

I’m only comfortable with Mike or myself feeding Wyatt right now. I really want Mike to be able to develop that bottle bond with him before we introduce anyone else to the mix. I have left Wyatt with a close friend and my mother-in-law for about 1-2 hours at a time. My mother-in-law seems more comfortable with him as he gets bigger. I’m still processing some of my own emotions about my relationship with her. Small doses are better for me for now.

Overall, I’m glad I decided to try the bottle as I do think it was time for some “me” time. I always stress the importance of self care during fertility treatments, but I think it’s just as important once you become a Mommy. Healthy, happy Mommy = healthy, happy baby 🙂

It seems every time I get caught up reading the blogs, you all go crazy and write like 1 post a day for 3 days straight. I am looking forward to catching up during Wyatt’s nap time over the next few days.