A rant about making babies on vacation

Twice in the past two weeks, I’ve had people say to me, “We hope to make Baby #2 on our upcoming vacation“.

WTF.

Why do fertiles always think that it’s THAT easy?

Both of these couples did get pregnant with Baby #1 their first month trying, but still…

I highly doubt either one understands the ovulation process.

There’s no guarantee their vacations will fall during prime fertile time.

And why would you feel the need to proclaim your initiation into the second round of baby making??? ESPECIALLY to (in)fertile me!!!!

I always hope for the best when anyone is trying to conceive, but it’s statements like this that add to the stigma around relaxation being a key component for fertility.

I get that a calm, serene environment can be perfect for conception, but the only vacation I’ll be making a baby on is the trip to my fertility clinic… and that’s hardly a vacation.

So next time you are thinking of taking a vacation to conceive your child, FUCK OFF and keep it to yourself.

Thank you. 🙂

/endrant

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29 thoughts on “A rant about making babies on vacation

  1. This suggestion is especially frustrating when made to infertilies. ‘Just go on a holiday/have you tried going on a holiday? it worked for me’. I saw one infertile on a chat board actually suggest it to another, and I commented (politely) that that piece of advice wasn’t very helpful. Bizarrely a few other women on the board actually said that they thought it could help… So the myth is alive. Even amongst some who should know better 🙂

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    • No!!!! That is just wrong. And irritating. The lady who was given the advice was probably thanking God you piped up. Also, hello, it’s hard to relax when you have a team of people up in your lady bidness to help you make a baby…. Or need to track it so you don’t miss an O window or have to take meds. Fertiles! I love ’em and thank god they go around humping each other with such self-assured confidence, but God, sometimes I hate ’em too! 😉

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  2. I got “just go on vacation – it will help you relax!” At least four times in one month. Which happened to be month 16 of our TTC journey and the month we had our initial consult at the FC. Also, month 16 of diligently tracking my cycles and never once ovulating. I’m surprised that all of the people who said that to me are still around to say dumb stuff. :/

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  3. It’s so strange to me! Because three of my friends did get pregnant on vacation and my eyes always go bugged eyed! And then I say…”That crap really happens?!” I also have the same reaction whenever someone tells me they have regular 28 day cycles. As someone diagnosed with Pcos and cycles ranging from 40 to 80 days…that’s crazy! And I thought impossible!

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  4. Oh, yes. I agree! An acquaintance said this to me recently. I asked if she planned her vaca around her ovulation dates. She looked at me like she had no idea what I was talking about and changed the subject. 😵

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  5. Haaa! Yes! I just had this girl at job#2, even after explaining what I’m going through (including a loss).. STILL said to me “oh you just need to relax” “they always say the 1st one is the hardest” I was not afraid this time to speak back. I was like “did you not just hear what I said? I’ve already HAD a 1st pregnancy, and 11 years of relaxing hasn’t helped so far…” She just kind of looked at me.

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    • Very much reminds of something my husband’s aunt said to us a few weeks back, “I’m sure #2 will come easily now that the stress of having #1 is out of the way”. Really… ??? Because in trying to have #1, I lost my left fallopian tube and we had to do IVF + ISCI.

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  6. They likely think it because for them this process has been easy, smooth and basically stress-free. I always laugh, because we value our vacations a lot and spend a lot of our discretionary income on them every year. I’d have a gaggle of children if that’s all it took!

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