Another one bites the dust

Remember that friend who had that party that made me feel like the infertile in the corner?

Well, she just announced her pregnancy!

Seriously Universe! Can you give me a break here? 

They tried for one, maybe two months, before conceiving.

On top of that, she would have been 5.5 weeks pregnant at that party – smoking cigs, smoking pot and drinking.


Fertiles have it so easy. No period tracking. No stress at ovulation time. Hell, they probably don’t even know it’s ovulation time. No care in the world. No rush to find out if it worked. No special diet. No abstaining from anything.

With every announcement, I am happy for my friends. I am relieved that they do not have to face the heartache, stress and uncertainty of infertility.

Yet, their announcements cut me a little deeper. They solidify the challenges we have face and further label us as infertile.

I will never accidentally get knocked up.

I will never conceive after a few months of trying.

I can only hope that my turn is soon and all the time, money, and emotion we’ve put into this journey will be worth it.


31 thoughts on “Another one bites the dust

    • Yeah I remember so many times hearing women joke about ”how it happens to everyone!”. It would never happen to us. I’m honestly more peeved that she has avoided me since that night. Most likely because she found out soon after. I know timing shouldn’t matter but it sucks to know people tread lightly around you. I have my weak moments but they are always in privacy. I can handle an announcement and if you are my true friend, being up front means so much more to me.

      Liked by 1 person

  1. I completely agree with this post you said it perfectly I will never become pregnant accidentally I can only hope our efforts eventually lead us to what we want… all we have is hope and I don’t think people realize how hard that can be at times but treating me different because of it just makes it harder…


    • Yes that’s exactly it. There is a time and a place to treat me different. And unfortunately, I feel like too often people don’t want to share their joy with you. I guess that credit I can give to my best friend. She has been normal to me about her pregnancy from a few days after she found out. Does that make it any easier? Not always, but it shows me she is true to me.

      Liked by 1 person

  2. God, that is annoying. I was just talking about this with my MIL. She said it was unfair for me. I told her I can barely hold that idea in my head it is so toxic and irrelevant. And far to painful to think about.


  3. Hunny if this friend reads this blog she may have kept it from you because she knows how heartbreaking this year has been for you and your husband and your words on here may give her the idea that you might hold it against her for getting pregnant. I don’t know. I understand how hard it is to get your period every month after you do everything right and sacrifice for the one thing you want and I’m so glad you are happy for your friend!


  4. Ughhhh. Sorry. This is all so very hard and unfair. I can only hope all this pain and suffering will be a distant memory for you soon enough.


  5. Totally understand the “I’m really happy for you, let me just jab you in the eye first, ok now I’m back to happy for you again…” feeling. After all this time trying I’m finally pregnant and my whole family is really excited. Well on Christmas my cousin announced she was pregnant with her 3rd oops! baby. She’s never even tried! So my first reaction was not me at my best. But I’m cool with it now 🙂


  6. I’m sorry that life is so unfair. What annoys me about this is that, if I read this correctly, they WERE in fact trying to get pregnant…yet she was still smoking and drinking anyway…right? It’s just so irresponsible of women to do things like that, I don’t understand it. I can see living it up if you aren’t trying and have no idea, but geeze!!


  7. Smoking, drinking and drugs?! Bad enough to learn that she’s pregnant but to know she was being reckless and partying while pregnant…wow. I am sorry she hasnt reached out to you since the party. Infertilty sure does weed out the true friends from the insincere ones. Wishing you success in 2015.


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