During our fertility journey, I’ve found the most support online – mainly through blogs or online forms.
I was able to find and connect online with women from my city. These are women who I may have stood behind in line at the grocery store, walked by at the mall or sat besides at a local sporting event without even realizing our similar paths.
Online, we share our stories, complain about the process and question what to do next. The details we share between each other are more than what some of our close friends and family know. (In)fertility can be lonely, but these online relationships bring me solace.
Yesterday, a group of us decided to get together in-person for lunch.
Leading up to the meet ‘n greet, I wondered how it would go?
Will they like me? Will we even have anything in common? Will my journey seem incomparable to theirs if they have been at it longer? Will they understand me?
A few minutes after meeting, I realized that the closeness we share online is transferable in-person. We laughed and surprisingly, no one cried. I really wasn’t sure if anyone would get emotional. None of us were on any crazy pills – except one (I think?)– and her bubbly personality masked any emotional insecurities that may have been hiding beneath her bright smile.
Most of us had been trying to conceive for about 2 years, but one woman was 4 years deep. More than anything, I valued her opinion on why she switched clinics. Her persistence gave me hope. Did she realize how much I respected her dedication?
Two of the women are starting their first rounds of IVF at the same clinic, on the same day. Seriously, what are the odds of that happening? One was hoping to do her 2nd FET in April or May. Another was on a break – like me – waiting for her husband’s counts to improve after surgery.
Our meet ‘n greet also proved how small of a world it is. We all have at least one mutual friend in common. This solidifies that fact that (in)fertility really does affect 1 in every 6 Canadian couples. Everyone knows someone who is facing trouble trying to conceive – whether they are aware of it or not.
Our city does have an (in)fertility support group that meets once a month, but none of us have attended yet. We all agreed that this lunch was a nice step into the offline world of (in)fertility support – less structured, more casual. Our get-together offered a place where you could be yourself and share your story with women can relate and truly care.
Just before we left, I said that one of us (at least) should be pregnant by June. Fingers-crossed.
Hopefully, we can meet for lunch again and grow these friendships moving forward.
Until next time ladies… I’ll be thinking about you.