The waiting game continues

12 dpIUI. 2 days til Beta. 

B.

F.

N. 

For anyone who’s new the online world of (in)fertility, that means BIG FAT (or FUCKING in my mind) NEGATIVE. 

My husband keeps saying we are in the game until the beta blood test. I’m completely unsure at this point.

My gut tells me no. I’ve given up on googling pregnancy side effects and what days BFP is most common. It’s just not worth it anymore. The facts are the facts. Google can’t help predict it. I’ll let my story unravel as it’s supposed to. 

With my sister and her boyfriend visiting this weekend, I haven’t really had time to process another failed cycle. But, I feel like I’ve found some hidden strength to make it through this potential BFN without a major breakdown. 

I’m going to POAS again tomorrow and probably again on Tuesday before I go for my blood test. The small glimmer of hope is still there. 

Until I know for sure, I’m finding ease in the sense that my time will come… it’s just a matter of when. 

 

 

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11 thoughts on “The waiting game continues

  1. I hope the beta will proof your test wrong! I swear I won’t pee on any freakin’ sticks before my beta in about 2 weeks after the IUI tomorrow. I’ve gotten myself so upset before when googling for bfp symptoms. It’s just not worth it! I feel defeated before I’m even having my first IUI done. Keeping my fingers crossed for a bfp for you!

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  2. Really hoping the beta brings better news for you. If I added up the time I spent googling xdp5dt during our last ICSI it’d be horrific lol. Am determined not to do it again this time as, like you say, it can’t affect the outcome…. bet I do though

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